What to Write in a Grandparents Day Card
Lines to write for a grandparent you see weekly and for one you barely know, what to do when the card is from a child too young to write, and what to say when their health has changed.
- Put the date on it. A card written for a drawer is found years later by someone who wants to know when it was sent.
- Name one thing you learned from them or one thing you always did together. It is the line that gets read again.
- Write to them individually where you can. A card addressed to both is easier and lands about half as hard.
- Say the thing you would say if you were braver. This is the category where people most often wish they had, and later cannot.
Grandparents keep cards. Almost universally, and often for decades, in a drawer or a tin or the back of a cupboard.
That one fact should change how you write one. You are not writing for today. You are writing something that will be found and read again, quite possibly by somebody else, years from now.
The structure
- Happy Grandparents Day, with what you call them.
- One specific thing you learned from them or always did with them.
- A line about now.
- Sign it the way you say it.
Step two is the card.
Name one specific thing
Not thank you for everything. One thing.
- You taught me to reverse a trailer and I have never once needed to, and I think about it every time I park.
- Every summer at yours smelled of cut grass and that terrible shed. Best weeks of my childhood.
- You are the only person who has never once been in a hurry with me.
- I still use your trick for peeling garlic and I tell everybody where it came from.
- I got my temper from Mum and my patience from you, and I know which one has been more use.
Those are the lines that get read again, and they are far easier to write than a summary of what somebody has meant to you across forty years.
From a young child
Keep the child's own words. Adults rewrite these and make them worse.
Ask a child what they like doing with Grandma and write down the answer exactly as given, wonky logic included. What lands is not the sentiment, it is the voice.
- I like it at your house because you let me have the biscuits.
- You are good at fixing things and you smell like the garden.
- Grandad is the best at football even though he is old.
A drawn picture with three misspelled words beats a neat message an adult composed on their behalf, every single time.
From an adult grandchild
This is where people go formal and should not. Say the thing plainly.
- I did not appreciate how much you did until I had my own. Thank you.
- I am glad my children know you. That was not guaranteed and I do not take it for granted.
- You have been the steady one in this family for as long as I have been in it.
For a first Grandparents Day
New grandparents are usually delighted and slightly unsure of the role.
- Your first one. He has no idea how lucky he is yet.
- Happy first Grandparents Day. You are extremely good at this already.
- Thank you for every Tuesday. We could not do it without you and we know it.
That last line matters. A very large amount of grandparent childcare goes unremarked, and saying it out loud once a year is the least the day is for.
For a great-grandparent
- Four generations in one room is not a common thing. Thank you for being the start of it.
- She has your hands. Happy Grandparents Day.
If a grandparent has died
The day is harder than it looks for anybody who has lost one, and a card that mentions the missing person is usually welcome rather than upsetting.
- Thinking about Grandad today as well. I know you are.
- Happy Grandparents Day, and I am sorry it is a strange one this year.
- I told the kids the story about him and the ladder. It went down well.
Our guides to what to say when someone dies and what to write in a sympathy card cover the fuller version.
Write to them separately
Where both are alive, two cards beat one addressed to both. It is more effort and it lands about twice as hard, because a joint card is necessarily about the pair and the specific thing you remember is almost always about one of them.
Say the thing you would say if you were braver
This is the category where people most often wish they had, and where the window closes without warning.
If there is a sentence you have been meaning to say to a grandparent, this is the card to put it in. Almost nobody regrets having written it and a great many people regret the opposite.
Beyond the card
The single best thing to do with a grandparent, and the one families wish they had done sooner, is to record them talking. Their childhood, their parents, how they met, the work they did. It takes an afternoon and it becomes more valuable every year.
The same material makes [a song about them](/create?occasion=grandparents day) work, and our guides to a grandparents day song, a custom song for grandma and a custom song for grandpa cover what to put in one.
For gifts rather than words, see sentimental gifts for grandma. For every other occasion, our what to write hub has the wording.
Frequently asked questions
What do you write in a Grandparents Day card?
Name one specific thing you learned from them or always did with them, rather than thanking them for everything. That is the line that gets read again, and grandparents keep these cards for decades.
What should a child write in a Grandparents Day card?
Their own words, written down exactly as given. Adults rewrite these and make them worse. A drawn picture with three misspelled words beats a neat message composed on the child's behalf.
What do you write for a first Grandparents Day?
Mark that it is the first, and if they are doing childcare, say so explicitly. A large amount of grandparent childcare goes unremarked, and naming it once a year is much of what the day is for.
Should you mention a grandparent who has died?
Usually yes. The day is harder than it looks for anybody who has lost one, and a card acknowledging the missing person is generally welcome rather than upsetting.
Should you send one card to both grandparents?
Two separate cards land about twice as hard. A joint card has to be about the pair, and the specific memory worth writing is almost always about one of them individually.